w
Member
Posts: 22
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Post by w on Apr 21, 2014 21:16:07 GMT
I was wondering if anyone else had experienced cyberstalking? I'm having a bad day and I keep worrying that she's posting bad things about me somewhere, or that she's reading this forum. It feels like I will never get rid of the feeling of someone watching me. Why didn't I report her when I had the chance?
Another thing- I keep getting missed calls on my mobile from an unknown number, every couple of days. Is this just cold callers or should I look into it?
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janine
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Admin
Posts: 1,185
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Post by janine on Apr 21, 2014 22:15:39 GMT
Hey W and welcome back,
I think it is very normal to feel being watched when we leave an abusive partner. Because the truth is: many abuser DO stalk their ex partners to gain their control over you back. And as much as we KNOW this and do not WANT to give them the satisfaction of feeling like they are stalking us- it happens and it a completely normal reaction to overcoming abuse. It is a bit like being nervous about the wolf we do not see in the woods. We would rather follow the wolf around at times to know where he is- even if this means we fall victim to his or her control.
If you are concerned about the calls, change your number. If the caller is without ID I am not sure there is much you can do. If the caller does not leave a voicemail there is no proof who it was (unless the police can do some legal trick and still trace that number back)
Have you had the chance maybe to talk to a counselor about your current feelings? Sometimes we need a little bit of professional outside support to get through this phase -as the abuse might have traumatized you and it is hard to rid yourself of those feelings all by yourself.
The good news is this period will end too and there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. You will not feel forever like she is watching you or wants you back. Often times ignoring an ex abuser and keeping 100% no contact makes them lose interest anyways. They move on to a victim.
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